Wondering...

"When will it be our turn?"  A constant question that comes to mind more lately. 

We get the privilege of congratulating many of our friends on the pregnancy and births of their babies.  Some of our friends we have been able to congratulate duplicate and multiple times since we started our journey to adopt.  Truly, I am so happy for my friends.  To see their joy on their faces, the excitement as they embark on a new adventure is truly a joy to see and watch.  A new journey has begun for all of them.  I can honestly say, parenting becomes them very, very well!

We have watched others build their family through adoption.  There story of the adoption journey has ended, and a new journey has just begun.  It is exciting to hear the joys they experiences.

Can I be honest with you?  Can I just say, we desperately want our next journey to begin too!  I think of Lindsay's last year and a half at home, and Katie and Courtney still in a age where they are available, before the craziness of high school life begins. 

But then I remind myself ... God's time is perfect.  So I wait.  I wait with the Lord.

I watch as others experience the first smiles, first steps, first school days, birthdays and holidays ... and I can't help but wonder.  What will it be like?  What will it be like to take Elijah to his first baseball game?  What will it be like to have our first tea party with Ruthie?  What favorite meals are they going to request at dinner time?  I can't help but wonder.

I was asked the other day, if our dog is to replace the kids we are waiting for.  Just in case you are wondering the same thing ... no he isn't.  We don't replace kids with dogs.  There is a clear difference for us.  Sometimes I wonder, as people watch us and wonder, if we are to just stop living until the day arrives.  I don't believe that is what God wants for us.  We are to continue living.

So that is what we will continue to do ... to live our life as God leads.  But I will be honest ... I still will wonder ...